Office Gossip

Today we had a team meeting.  These are always long, always filled with information that isn’t necessary and always loud.  By loud I mean out of 10 women and one male supervisor, we usually have 10 women and one male supervisor all talking at once.  It makes no sense and starts to grind a migraine into my already sensitive head.

Today we learned there is an issue in the office (not necessarily team) around gossiping.  Now please understand my office is made up 85% women.  It may even be higher.  I think if they want the gossiping to stop, hire more men.  Then it wouldn’t be so bad.  We would have more talk about sports, and bbq and beers (don’t I stereotype well?)?  But you have a lot, A LOT of highly confidant, cocky women all working in one office and gossip is bound to start – on a daily basis.  I find myself the “butt” of gossip quite often.  I don’t know why.  Maybe because of my outgoing personality, maybe because I talk to everyone, maybe because I am very friendly with most of the men in the office – just platonic people!!!  But ya, office gossip is coming under fire.

Don’t most offices have gossip?  I think if someone is hurt by that gossip then by all means, the gossipers should be taken down and snippered, but if people are gossiping about other random things, and no one gets hurt, please don’t take away our rights to socialize!  I know we are at work, but at times – especially in our field where it can get really intense some days, being able to socially gossip with our friends in mandatory.

I know there is a very, VERY fine line between gossiping and bullying – and it can be crossed unintentionally, it has happened to me.  No one meant to hurt my feelings, but alas they were.  However I am also an adult and I confronted those people and they apologized.  They weren’t using their normal common sense.  Instead of bringing this up at team meetings and making everyone question every thing they have ever said to a co-worker, why not ask people to be responsible for their own happiness.  We are adults, we are all extremely educated, employed individuals who have a sense of right and wrong.  If we were children, this would be an issue, but we are not supposed to be so I don’t feel like we should be treated as such.

I admit to gossiping, I try to do it with people I am close to, in private areas and I never mean to hurt or offend.  I usually say nothing that I wouldn’t say to someones face and never about their personal life because it doesn’t affect me and it is NONE of my business.  Usually if I am talking about someone it has to do with how they are professionally because that affects me and usually I have talked to the person, but I want to vent to my closest friend at the office.

You can’t stop gossiping.  It’s been around, I am sure, since the beginning of time.  I am sure some of Jesus’s disciples gossiped about what they were really doing and if it was worth it.  I am sure the emperors gossiped about the women they slept with and pretty much every single person in Hollywood gossips, so please don’t tell me I am not allowed!

Rant over…

This is true isn’t it?  If no one spoke a word in meetings other than the boss, our meetings would be 15 minutes instead of 1-2 hours in length.  If no one was allowed to speak at work except for clarification and to our clients, we also wouldn’t be allowed to gossip.  So I suggest implementing mandatory silence at the office!  My migraines would weaken and no ones feelings would get hurt.  No one would have to defend themselves, no one would have to stand up to the few bullies who may exist.   Yes silence…it’s a great idea!

XOXO Nikilee

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