According to the freedictionary.com a phobia can be described as this
1. A persistent, abnormal, and irrational fear of a specific thing or situation that compels one to avoid it, despite the awareness and reassurance that it is not dangerous.
Yesterday when I was driving around with A from work, I realised my car needs washing ASAP. I mean it’s so dirty that you can’t even tell the beautiful shiny blue that lies underneath a thick film of road salt, dirt and sand. It’s bad. My poor car. I told A I couldn’t wash it until I was in my own neighbourhood and when she asked why (we have a perfectly good car wash around the corner from our work) I had to admit to her my irrational fear: car washes.
I have no fear of being in a car wash. If I am a passenger I find it exciting even. However, as a driver, my anxiety hits new highs, my knuckles turn white and until that door opens to let me out I panic. When I was dating GBF this was not an issue because he would take my car for me to get cleaned. He fed my fears out of love. However when we broke up, and I was alone, I had to do it on my own. Thankfully he took me a few time to the car wash closest to our house and had me go through a few times in order for me to understand exactly how and when everything works.
So now, I can use the Esso gas station a car wash! However, the idea of using ANY other car wash causes the blood to drain from my face. A has said she will go with me. I’m not sure if that will work. I know people are reading this shaking their head thinking how stupid this Nikilee character is. But trust me, this is my real life, this is me.
For better or for worse